You just had a breakup and before you know it; your gal is hanging around with another guy! And here you were, planning to win her back! Don’t worry. Just because she is seeing another guy does not mean it is all over. It could very well be a rebound relationship.
Rebound relationship is one where a person who is just out of a relationship, gets into another one just to get over the breakup blues. It is like a cushion. It helps the person transition from the brokenhearted phase to independent phase. This makes them feel less lonely and insecure. You could say that they are using this new person just to get out of the real love.
But you know in your heart of hearts that what you had was the genuine thing. This should give you hope. The very fact that she needs a rebound relationship to get out of her feelings for you proves how much you mean to her.
But before you start working on getting her back, decide, do you really want her back? Only if you feel confident that you really shared a deep, true love can you tide over this phase and use the rebound relationship to your benefit.
Notice the person she is hanging about with. You might notice that he is totally opposite to you. If you dressed in formals, he would love casuals, if you hated sports, he’d be crazy about soccer…you get the drift.
She could be doing this for either of the following reasons: A) she wants someone as different from you as possible to help her forget you. B) She was not satisfied with the previous relation and is looking for what was lacking.
Either way, make note of her new choice and try to improve yourself. As she gets to know the other guy better, she will start seeing that he is no match for you. Now, she will want you back in her life.
Accept her back gracefully. Do not be pompous but don’t grovel for her love either. Let her notice what she missed in the relation. Let her see for herself what a swell guy you are. You make changes, but do not brag about it or force her attention to it, she will notice with time.
If you made a mistake, apologize. But do not over-do it. Do not make promises you cannot keep. When she sees you and takes notice of you, she will find out that you did mean what you said. You are a changed man now.
Change for better, but do not change what is in you and who you really are. Do not model your personality to suit her. She will have to love you the way you are. Else, you both are just not meant to be.
So, when your ex finds a new person and goes into a rebound relationship, don’t go back begging. Remember the old wise saying “If you really wish to have something, set it free. If it belongs to you, it will come back to you. If it doesn’t, it was never yours”.
